Catching Up...Moving Forward

OK, so....

Yes, September 11th was the last time I posted.... To be honest, I got a little wigged out about blogging this adventure. Felt like it was a little on the selfish bragging side to do so, I mean who else wants to hear about MY rants and raves? And this coming from the person who searches for new blogs to read daily...I love people watching, and reading blogs gets lumped into this catagory.

So I'm back with some new resolve. After reading back on the few posts I did make, I'm more sorry I didn't keep up with it. For me this is a great way to chronicle my adventure, because it is CERTAINLY that if nothing else!

To catch up to speed....

Shortly before the White Rock half, I was contacted by the White Rock race committee. I had submitted to them my reason to run which of course was my brother, and about my weight loss. They let me know they liked my story, thought it was inspiring, and would I be ok with doing some PR for them? WOW!!! So we met in Trophy Club behind the Marriott Solana, and did the interview and they taped me running some--of course it started to sprinkle JUST as they started taping. Got alot of ragging from my team for looking so cleaned up while running--had makeup on, and my hair down, got LOTS of laughs at how my hair was doing the "girl swishing" thing while I ran, ha ha. It was a nice interview, here's a link to it: http://cbs11tv.com/gethealthytexas/Runs.To.Honor.2.1350493.html Doug Dunbar, who interviewed me, was very nice and kind, made it a nice experience. God love him he was so sick that day but he prides himself on his strong work ethic and doesn't miss work. He'd just been to the doctor before he came for this, I felt so bad he was out for this.

The whole interview thing was topped off with the coolest experience. At our post-race party at Luke's, our store manager introduced me to Mr. Lucas, the owner/founder of the store! He told Mr. Lucas about me, and I was able to tell my story about the interview to him. He was truly interested, and congratulated me, and made notes of it on his notepad. Too cool!

I am happy to say that I completed the White Rock half in 2:43! I knew I could do it in under 3 hours, was wishing for 2:45. Mom and my brother came up the night before the race, I was so happy they were able to make it. Race morning I rode down with my race partner, her hubby and friends....the line to get into parking was HORRENDOUS, we were genuinely concerned we might miss the gun! Truth be told, we made it there with maybe 5 minutes to spare!! We were in the last corral, so couldn't see the starting festivities. It took literally 15 minutes for us to start moving--over 20,000 participants! THRILLED to say that when we got up to the start, that the music was still blaring, and the confetti was still shooting out of the air guns over the starting line--really cool we turtles weren't forgotten in the hoopla! The start was larger than life--I'll admit I had tears. I made a conscious decision to really live in the moment that day, to make the effort to see all the small things, tell volunteers thank you, look at the cheering crowd, encourage others around me. But I didn't want to just rush past these moments. This was the crowning glory of a TWO YEAR GOAL, I was going to suck everything out of it for all it was worth.

Just before the one mile marker, we saw my family. I was so happy that they did make it. It was wonderful that they were there to see this become a reality. I was VERY happy that my partner's husband decided to run this race with us. Don't forget, he's Marathon Man--the same man who ran over 40 miles for his 40th birthday! So you know a half at our turtle pace had to be painful and drive him crazy, when he knew he could pound out a full in our slow-mo time. The good thing about Marathon Man running with us is all the wisdom he imparted to us--when to slow down, what to watch for, where to run on the road, things to be aware of, when to stop and take a walk/water break. He was able to think for us the first several miles, so we could learn "on the job", so to speak. I was never so grateful for him than I was that day.

By the time we got to about mile 8 or so, my partner was fighting through some mental issues, so I ran ahead a smidge. By mile 11, my left hip was screaming loud at me. I was so angry---my muscles were great, my breathing wasn't labored...but my HIP--REALLY!!!?? By mile 12 it was making it clear it was done, but I kept plowing through. When I got to the end of the race, and could see the finish line, I tried so hard to get it into gear to pick up the pace, but my ole body was having none of it. I realized that I was sobbing as I was making my last decent, it was so overwhelming to see that I had completed a goal!!

As I approached the finish line, I hear my name yelled out to the left of me---it's my brother! K told me later they had to wheedle their way in to get my brother past the finish line, but they did and I am thrilled to say that he and I crossed the finish line hand-in-hand. It was an AMAZING moment. It made my two year journey to that point feel very complete.

It was awesome seeing so many people from my team at the finish line, as well as other friends who had run. I was never so happy as to have a picture taken with my partner, with my brother and crossing the line. It was an amazing day, it was an amazing feat, and I am very VERY proud of that medal.

As for now....I'm back to training at Luke's with my partner and the rest of the "back of the pack" friends of mine. We did a six mile run as a time trial yesterday morning, was a little on the slow side but I'll own up to not running as much as I should have over the holidays. But I'm glad to be back....

Looking forward to what 2010 has in store for me with this adventure. I'm shooting for a half every month this year....I'll keep you posted on how it goes...

Why I Run....

As stated in my first post, I run because of my hero, my brother Casey. It was eight years ago this day that our world changed...for better or for worse. Casey signed on into the Corps shortly after 9/11/01, and before we knew it he was shipping out for the initial invasion into Iraq...and before we knew it we were bringing him home, broken, from Iraq.

9/11 is not a good day for our family. It's not a good day for alot of families.

I wake up every morning to the towers falling. The reality of what we lost stares me in the face the moment my eyes open every day with my brother's legs gone. The reality of what the cost of freedom is, is there every moment, every waking breath I take.

Every day that I lace up my running shoes, I am lacing them up for my brother. He will never lace up another pair of shoes onto his feet again....let that sink in.....really sink in....never, EVER again. Every step I take, every mile I run, I draw upon my brother's strength.

I have NO EXCUSE to not use my legs. If my brother can keep on keepin' on, if he can hand-crank a marathon, what's my reason not to run? I hope that when I run I can bring awareness to the world the struggles of our heroes, and a reminder that there is STILL A WAR ON TERROR---yes, that is what it is, and I don't give a damn if that's PC or not thank you very much White House...

So today is a tough day for all of us in our house...remember to thank your heroes for their service, and remember that all gave some and some gave all for you and I to live in the land of the free and the home of the brave......

Highest Highs and Lowest Lows

Ya gotta love running, it's so much like life....it's a roller coaster ride that can take you to the highest hills, then throw you down into valleys that make your stomach turn, then pick you back up into euphoria again...

Ended last week's running with a whopping eight mile run. It was spectacular to make it in a decent time, run with good friends, and accomplish it without getting hurt. Top of the hill moment...

Monday (Labor Day) the whole family headed to downtown Ft Worth for the Fort Worth Running Club Labor Day run. We'd had a good weekend with family for a family reunion, were rested, ate pretty well, so was thinking we were in good shape. We picked up the sitter at 6:10am, and headed into Cowtown. Parking was easier than expected...so far, so good. Kiddo ran with our friends' kiddos in the 1K and got a fantastic trophy for his accomplishment....I ran with him as a warm up, all's lookin' good, but GEEZ it's humid and gettin' hot fast. Decided that this morning I'd try a shot of GU before the race started (since it was only 3 miles) to see how I felt with it. Gun goes off, and off we go. K ran in front of me, as he was nervous and didn't want me to make him any more anxious. I ran with partner Kristi and her munchkin, who runs most 5K's with us, she's AMAZING. Right out of the gate, I can tell my body is not wanting to shift gears. We get to mile 1, and Kristi is ahead of me, keeping up with her munchkin...and I'm dragging behind. I'm feeling a little nauseous (which I normally don't feel), could it be the GU? I plug through to mile 2, and as we pass it, my body decides it is DONE, no more. I ignore said signals and keep plugging away, one foot in front of the other. Then we hit the levy we have to go UP AND OVER....that means straight up a hill....uuuuuugh..... By the time I hit mile 3, I'm ready to throw in the towel, I am hurting at an all new high level--absolutely no energy, can't catch my breath, major muscle fatigue. The cool thing with this race is that it starts and ends at Montgomery Plaza, which is the old Montgomery Ward building that was saved from destruction and turned into shopping with luxury condos above them. There is a huge tunnel through the building, so it makes for a spectacular finish. I can't seem to get the speed up to plow through...and pretty much plod through because I have to....pretty uneventful. Kristi finished ahead of me, K behind me. Found our times later that afternoon...a miserable 36:59....UGH!

I've dissected the race to the nth degree, being that I am my own worst enemy. But good thing is I can say I learned alot from it. Didn't eat right the night before or the morning of, GU doesn't seem like a match for me, took the GU at the wrong time, was worried about my kiddo and the sitter (who was more than competent!!), was carrying too much crap in my hands....yada, yada, yada.....

So I had scheduled another 5K for the following Thursday evening. It was the Freedom Run in downtown Dallas, supporting our local policemen and repercussions of 9/11, which is too close to home for us. Decided that as I wanted to set myself up for success, I would listen to my body. After sparring at tae kwon do Wednesday night, I walked straight next door to the italian place and had a salad and decent portion of spaghetti marinara (the good real kind, made by real Italians, not the cheap American sugar sauce) while my body was still in burn mode and I was sweating like a fountain. Yes, I know I'm supposed to be on veggies and protein, but if I'm running, I have GOT to have some carbs in my system--I've already proven to myself that none and running can't work. Did not do boot camp Thursday morning, decided to rest. Ate decent all day Thursday on my dr diet. As I headed downtown, had a small snack. After an hour and a half in the traffic, as well as fighting rain, found a spot to park and headed for the race.

Good news for this race was that because of the rain, it cooled off significantly! I joked with the sitter when I picked him up from school, what were the odds of it cooling down 10 degrees in the next two hours....be careful what you wish for, it cooled off TWENTY degrees but a constant stream of rain was the tradeoff...which I will take! I ended up meeting up with my friend Tammy in the lineup, and we ran it together....you just can't beat running with a friend!

Best news is that my time was down BIG time....35:38!

Tomorrow, we run NINE miles with our training group. WOW, nine miles.....I'm not thinking about it yet....I'll just do what I do best in the morning, put one foot in front of the other, and keep running with the highs and lows...

Feelin' Like A Rockstar...

OK, so I can't even wait to say it.......I RAN EIGHT MILES TODAY!!!!!!!!

Talk about a feeling of huge satisfaction. I'll even be so bold and say I'm proud of myself. Yep, I'm that full of happiness to say it.

We ran the same route we always do...and there's a certain feeling of comfort in that. We know exactly where 1 1/2 miles is, where 2 is, where 3 is, and so on. We know that at 4 miles we can get "back to the barn syndrome" and know it's just four more back and we're DONE.

I ran with partner Kristi as always, and added on friends Janna and Tammy as well. When we came up on Janna, she was expressing EXACTLY to us what Kristi and I just had been saying, how our rapidly increasing mileage was a little indimidating, and there was some anxiety on our part. So we added her into our little group, and we kept pounding it out. As we got closer to mile 4, we added in Tammy to the mix and our foursome kept it going and going.....because let's face it, there is NOTHING better than running with someone else, and even better a group. You're more motivated, you have great conversations, and you begin to know that all those thoughts going through your head are not just in your head, but someone else's, too....and you feel like one of the crowd which at times is what we want and need (we don't use 'normal' in our house, such a thing does NOT exist.)

But lemme tell ya something so cruel about this route....it's not the hills, or the mileage, or the weather....it's the stinkin' Krispy Kreme we have to run by...on a Saturday morning...in the prime hours of chugging out those bites of heaven for the kids in our area. People here either loooove Krispy Kreme (that would be me) or abhor it (saying it's too sweet), so running past the mecca of sweetness as the delictable smell wafts in the air as we run by is just plain cruel to this no-carbs-allowed body.... I keep telling myself that the reason why I'm pounding the pavement so hard is BECAUSE of Krispy Kremes, so you'd better cowboy up in your mind, chick, and get over it..... :)

Also feelin' like a rockstar because Monday morning, on Labor Day, hubby, kiddo and I, along with partner Kristi, her marathon man Steve and their kiddos will be running in downtown Ft Worth. Excited as the kids will get to do a 1K run (we adults will use as a warmup) and get a trophy for their efforts--COOL! And the rockstar feeling comes from this statement...it's JUST a 5k. Can't even begin to relay how AWESOME it feels to recognize in my mind that 3.1 miles is NOTHING, it's just a weekday morning run.......come on, how FREAKING COOL is that? This, coming from a woman who never ever ever thought she would say those words. Hubby is working on his time for his sprint tri that is coming up, so I'll be doing what I can to encourage him, and not get injured. Marathon Man Steve has stressed to us that doing anything additional to our training might not be as productive as we think, because getting hurt for something inconsequential is not a good thing. BUT---being as Kristi and I can justify most anything, like I said this is the equivalent of a morning run which we'd have to do anyhow, so we are running this...and got COOL tech shirts out of the deal!

For Kristi and I, I think we're more excited about shopping at the big Luke's Locker sale after the run than we are the run--20% off non-sale items--this is HUGE!! We were schooled this morning about needing to start getting our timing down in using supplements to replace some energy (ie--using sports beans, or GU, or the souped up honey) so we're buying a little of each at 20% off so we can do some taste testing and timing in using them on our runs to come. They have shoes on clearance, too, who doesn't love a good shoe sale (and being as I wear a honkin' size 12D...she said they had a good selection out in 12's, WHOOP! I'm there looking for another workout pair!)

Best part of the morning, though......between you and me.....the massage afterwards! There were some ladies from a local chiropractic center offering a sampling of what they could do, and I had my masseuse attack my neck.......oy, had to keep myself from melting off the table.... It hurt like the dickens, but she kneaded the bejesus out of my neck muscles....let's just say on Tuesday I will be immediately scheduling with her...

Here's looking forward to a good Monday run with the families.....party like a rockstar.... :)

Slow Down Broke Down....

WARNING: This is a five minute pity party...click onto something else if you don't want to read it, otherwise, just grin and bear it...

There used to be a DJ of sorts on one of the country stations in Dallas who did the morning and afternoon traffic reports. A sort of Larry the Cable Guy, but local. Being that deep down I'm as redneck as it gets, despite how much I might pull up my collar at times, I loved the guy. Anything to add humor to the afternoon hell otherwise known as surviving your drive to/from work was a good thing.

So this DJ had his own vernacular for traffic. One of my favorite terms of his was "slow down broke down." This described huge traffic jams on some major freeway where little or no traffic could get through. It just gradually slowed down to moving slow as molasses as the broke down vehicle sat there until the wrecker arrived. (Have to tell you, deciphering redneck is about as strange as it gets...in my head I just assume everyone knows what the made-up words mean...shows how southern I am...)

All that being said....I'm a slow down broke down today in every way possible....

Last week, after getting my diagnosis of PCOS, I began eating per doctor's orders what is basically the Atkins diet. I am happy to say that I have not cheated ONCE, and when I weighed in yesterday I'd lost almost 4 lbs! So okay....it's working much to my chargrin. As such, my carboholic/sugar craving body is in pretty much withdrawals as we speak...and I AM HUNGRY! I can't eat enough proteins and veggies to satisfy my hunger or sweet tooth, and at times I feel like I'm going insane. The good part of this is that I can already tell I do "feel" better in that I'm not sugar crashing and thus falling asleep mid-afternoon like I did, so this is a win-win, right? But dangit, fixing my kiddo meals that smell so amazing (who knew a grilled cheese and strawberries could be so tempting) is about to topple me over...

Cruddiest part of eating as such is it takes LOADS of prep-work, if you want to save money. Sure I could buy all the prepared/pre-cut/pre-measured meats for a pretty penny, but I've gotta save where I can. You have to understand...and if you'd told me these self-awareness statements ten years ago I wouldn't have believed you because I was so sure I was going to be Suzy Homemaker with 3 kids and PTA president.......I am NOT Martha Stewart, I am the furthest thing from Donna Reid, I only wish I could be like Ina Garten or Giada DeLaurentiss (or look like her for that matter) or Rachel Ray, and cook with ease....ain't me. I have a kitchen because it came with the house--PERIOD. So all this having to grill meat, prepare fresh salads, boil eggs, etc.....whipping on my part. YES--I know, it's working eating as such, but the prep work SUCKS.

And I'm getting my hormones readjusted. My levels according to bloodwork were WAAAAY off, so I'm not the most pleasant person to be around, to say the least to be polite. I'm praying once this is fixed and the correct dosage found, I'll be a happier, more pleasing person to converse with, and the bi-polar-ish ways will be gone....cause I don't think I (or my hubby or kiddo) can take the mood swings much longer...

Then there's running....isn't that the point of this blog? Last Saturday we had an easy 5 mile run. I opted to take it easy and ran with partner Kristi, who also was taking it easy. No big sprint-outs, no big tempo running...we enjoyed the gorgeous weather and our conversation. Towards the end of the run, I noticed my quads and hams were REALLY tight, and there was this 'twang' in my right ankle....hmmm... Coach LeaAnn pointed out with my diet change my muscles were needing the carbs to replenish, so we make a plan of attack to deal with the tightness--check. But that 'twang'....hmmm...

Boot camp started back yesterday morning. I am masochistic, I actually love boot camp. My trainer is phenomenal (not a screamer AT ALL, just an encourager, genuinely CARES about his clients) and keeps me going. BC was fine yesterday morning....but today...not so much. I've had a nagging neck joint/muscle issue I've been seeing my chiro for since Feb 08, and with a recent ridgehand to the head in a sparring match it's come back. Lately I guess I've been sleeping on it wrong, because this morning I woke up and didn't think I could move it, until I got going veeeery slooooowly. BC was a beating, trying to get my reps done....but then I added in the runs there....the 'twang' in my ankle...now a TWANG. Trainer says he thinks it's my diet and muscles having a fit at the lack of carbs, asked me to take it easy this week so it doesn't develop to something worse.

So.....that leaves me chronically hungry, witchy, in the kitchen which I hate, with a stiff neck and an ankle that if it could talk would sound like a guitar being plucked with a loud offkey TWANG when I step wrong......

Yep, I'm a slow down broke down today.....

End of pity party, felt good to get it out.....time to be proactive and figure all this out to fix it....back to work, washing machine signal just went off.....moving on....

Trials and tribulations...

OK, anyone who's lived in TX long enough knows how blazing hot it is here from about mid-May through about the beginning of October. It's seemed the last few years that the first real cold snap we've gotten has been on Halloween night, just in time for all those cute little costumes to be covered up with us Texans' version of a coat (compared to northern standards in coats, we're pitiful.)

Therefore, training in the heat this summer has been one of the toughest challenges to come upon, to say the least. This past week's running has been an uphill climb. Most days have been so humid that you feel like you're underwater, and putting one foot in front of the water feels just like when you're in the pool trying to run.....slow, sluggish, and pointless. The heat has just been life-sucking this week. At the end of three miles my wick-away shirt is sopping wet---you know it's hot when your shirt is dripping sweat from it. I feel like someone's standing on my chest when I try to breathe in the heat and humidity...gotta love asthma (and gotta love the new inhalers that have come out, SO much better than plain ole albuterol!)

My husband and I both faced discouragement this week training. Some days we feel like we're not doing enough to get ready for our goals, despite that we're following the prescribed plan for where we should be. Other days it just doesn't seem to click. Some days we feel so out of gas it feels like it'd be easier to throw in the towel, but we push forward to keep going.

Just when I think "is this all worth it?" we do get some good news to keep us plugging forward.... Took K's bike in today, he was concerned something was wrong with it only to find out he's SUPPOSED to air up the tired every other day, let's just say the PSI was so embarrasingly low that the tech said it was a miracle he didn't get a pinched flat and hurl himself into a nasty accident (gotta love starting a new sport and "conveniently" finding out about these kinds of important things to know by accident...literally...let's just say mama will be going into the store with him tomorrow when we go to get clips put on his pedals and some other gear, and asking lots of potentially embarrasing questions only newbies ask to find out all the things he's SUPPOSED to be doing that we weren't told....hey, everyone's had to ask them before when they started!)

Good news on my front, after searching for months to find a doctor who would truly take an interest in me, not run me through their office like cattle, actually call me back (GASP!) with test results and actually take time to talk through said results......I FOUND SUCH A PERSON!!! Can't still believe that I have, but yes.....a doctor who actually CARES about patients and is actually PASSIONATE about helping patients. She ran quite a bit of bloodwork on me, worked me over from top to bottom, got paperwork from previous doc's who were worthless....and determined that I have a condition called PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome.) I'll spare you boring details, but LOOOOONG story short my hormones are now actually being put back on the scale (I was almost at zero with them...yep, that scary) and she's dealing with the lack of weight loss. Downside is I'm essentially eating an Atkins-type diet now, but with everything she's faced with from the results, she hopes that I will start to see the pounds come off, and that more importantly some of the fat come off, thus creating a new me and making me feel so much better inside and out. Praise God! It should remedy some of the not-so-nice-person issues I have when I feel so blah, as well as make working out easier, give me more stamina for tae kwon do, and in general look better! I am just so grateful to have someone in my corner finally in the medical field who gives a flip about me, rather than just being a dollar sign.

So facing an easy 5 mile run in the morning....preparing for 8 miles next week....health is looking to be getting under control slowly but surely. K has a ride in the morning with his training partner on his newly fixed bike.....gotta keep looking for the positives, otherwise I'm sunk!

All's well that ends well....

It's The Little Victories...

While running our seven mile run this morning, coach Lea Ann said the words our little group needed to hear (and I paraphrase)..."When you're training for a half, it's the little victories that get you through it."

I couldn't agree with her more. It's those little victories I've thought about, and they are abounding around me...

This week I ran with Kevin one morning on his training program, and was thrilled to do a little less time and intervals. It was so nice to run with someone else, we were going at a nice easy pace. By the end of the run I realized that I wasn't out of breath when we finished the last interval! It was the coolest thing to see how far I've come--last January I couldn't run further than two minutes before I was ready to walk. I was actually, dare I say it outloud, proud of myself?

I find myself being able to roll out of bed before the alarm goes off. For whatever reason, I instinctively seem to be waking at 4:50am, 10 minutes ahead of schedule. It gives me the few minutes I need to wake up and attempt to start functioning, rather than doing so cold turkey. Whatever the reason is, I'm happy it happens, it's making life much easier for everyone as the day rolls on--the saying is "if mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy"....

I'm not skipping any runs anymore. I'm beginning to see how the hard work of training during the week pays off. Just that realization is worth its weight in gold.

This week I made it up two hills WITHOUT STOPPING that have kicked my backside every single day. I couldn't breathe when I got up them, and I wasn't running fast up them, but I did it without stopping. Total victory dance (in my head) when I got to the top.

I have started taking Fridays off from most activities, to give my body a good rest before Saturday morning runs. Sadly, my parts aren't as new as they used to be, and combined with sparring in tae kwon do plus all my activities, parts are wearing out...my hip is a little wonky...my elbows always kill me...my knees have their days...my neck is finicky....I know, I know, cue the pity party (not). I find I'm in better shape in many ways to tackle our group runs if my body's not hurting me from a pounding on Friday. Yesterday afternoon I started to notice that I was grumpy, and felt sluggish...and was getting antsy, like I just needed to 'do something'...and it dawned on me that I was MISSING MY RUNNING! This from a brain who was so convinced she wouldn't ever run...pin a blue ribbon on me, I feel like I've won the Olympics just for getting to this mindset.

This morning in our group run, as we ended down a hill, and turned left onto a flat to end, I took off! I began to think about how I'd survived the run with a smile this morning; I had looked forward to running with my coaches and teammates; I'd thoroughly enjoyed the conversations about our lives and catching up with them; I wasn't dying from the run, I actually ENJOYED IT! As these thoughts settled into my thick skull, it was as if I had my own "Sound of Music" moment on top of the hill, and instead of twirling 'round, I took off for the finish line (which also held peanut butter sandwiches and oranges there...hey it's ALL ABOUT BREAKFAST PEOPLE!) It was a joyous moment, and my feet seemed to pick themselves up with the happiness my heart was feeling.

It was a pure joy to be able to run this morning, and I am so thankful for this blessing. Little victories, my man....little victories...